Earlier this year, a book on parenting memoir of the tiger mother battle hymn sensation in the United States, sparking a heated debate about education thought idea, this also caused wide attention of the Chinese people.

　　The author Amy chua, a chinese-american, Harvard University, bachelor of arts and doctor of law, the Yale university professor. Approximate the sheep in Europe and the relaxation education situation, Ms. Chua in Chinese parents" high expectations and strict parenting to two children

　　Finally two children are outstanding, learning and music are all very good, is the envy of achievements, locally known as music child prodigy. The tiger mother warsong revealing the author experienced a course of raising two children and parenting experience.

　　Read the book, page by page feel Amy chua education child"s real and true feelings, amazing chua"s devotion and dedication, experience the extraordinary Cai Meier and absolute, step by step into the joys and sorrows of the author, Amy chua and her two children image lifelike show in sight.

　　Cai Meier writes:

　　Become an expert, actually there is no fun at all. Any skills to master, must pay the hard work. And from the nature of children, never love. Therefore, the beginning don"t give them opportunities to choose don"t work hard, it becomes crucial.

　　Don"t give children choose not to opportunity, became the basic idea and starting point of the Cai Meier parenting. Nothing is born like hard. The children more love with open arms to embrace. American education special emphasis on respect for the child, often give children the right to choose. As a result, many children will choose to give up very easily. And as a parent, the most unfavorable to protect the behavior of the child"s self-esteem, is to see their children gave up the attempt in the face of hardship, but their inaction.

　　Don"t give children choose don"t work hard, is to help children choose to chance. Let the child choose a meaningful things, then concentration and strength to rush toward, perseverance. Actually, the process itself, the children can benefit from life. Develop children treatment enterprise concentration and strength to rush toward, perseverance attitude and will quality, this is the direction of chua"s parenting. Don"t give children choose don"t work hard, this is really a parenting is the best choice. Strict management and supervision, it is Amy chua"s parenting patterns, Chinese traditional education mode is Amy chua said.

　　I have recently read Battle Hymn of Tiger Mother published by The Penguin Press in 2021. This autobiography was written by the Chinese American woman Amy Chua, a tenured professor in Yale Law School. She causes a sensation because her strict but unique parenting which brings excellent performance of her two daughters.

　　This autobiography tells the course of Amy Chua how she raised the two daughters in Chinese parenting way. It is divided into three parts. At the first part, it gives some introductions of the two daughters, the family. And in the second and third parts, the writer tells more details in the process of raising her two different daughters and the difficulties she was confronted in the process, and most importantly the success the daughters achieved in music which brought Amy Chua pride as well as the whole family.

　　To some extent, I don’t like Amy’s parenting in some aspects. In my opinion, she deprived the nature of children and pushed too much pressure on their children, especially on Lulu who was under the shadow of her excellent elder daughter—Sophia. While I was reading the third part in the rebellion part, I couldn’t control my own emotion, I felt what Lulu felt and even hated against her selfish and autocratic mother. I couldn’t understand why Amy didn’t let Lulu get up from sit, for water, not even to go to the bathroom when Lulu just wanted a rest during the long hours’ practice of violin. She made Lulu practice violin all day during the family’s vacation abroad. She spoiled the vacation by letting the other family members waiting the practice. She was unreasonable.

　　But next what I do is to admire her.

　　There is an old Chinese saying “property can never last for three generations”。 But Amy Chua did change it! Her parents came to U.S and suffered a tough life at the very beginning. They taught Amy math and piano in an extreme strict way when she was a kid. Under the influence of her parents, now Amy is frugal and pretty strict with her daughters and herself. They are the valuable points of her. Although she is so extreme on her parenting, she has the advisable ideas that the parents and the parents to be to learn.

　　Firstly, as parents, they couldn’t ignore their children and put all focus on their job. There is no excuse for not concerning their children. Except supervising her daughters, Amy Chua has to give lessons in university, write books and handle the family chores. She is so busy, but she doesn’t ignore the daughters.

　　Secondly, parents should be strict with their children especially when they are kids because kids lack of self-control. They should not indulge their children in internet or sleepovers.

　　Thirdly, parents should master some skills in parenting. As a matter of fact, there are so many Chinese parents who are strict with their children with no avail of success. Success can’t be totally copied, because some parents ignore the skills in parenting. When their children don’t follow their will or perform well enough to satisfy them, they will lose their temper and even beat their children, yes, of course, Amy Chua will be mad but she won’t beat her daughters, in this condition, she will be sober and wait until her daughters perform well enough. She learnt some music knowledge in her children’s class and supervised them patiently. She knew where to correct the mistakes and gave the children extraordinary success.

　　Tiger mother aroused a big heat in parenting and threw such an important issue for us to think about. Battle Hymn of Tiger Mother gives us really some enlightenment. Anyway, that’s a really unique experience in reading this book.

其实读这本书是因为我根本不相信简单粗暴的方法能够培养出优秀的人才，我相信该书一定会为我展不同教育理念下的冲突和实践。虎妈确实很粗暴，但并不简单!
虎妈没有让人失望，在这本书的最后，更加明确而清晰的阐述了她的观点，还举了一个有趣的例子。她认为：西方父母对孩子的自尊担忧颇多，但是作为父母，最不利于保护孩子自尊心的行为，就是你眼看着他们在困难面前放弃努力而不作为。
而她在教育小女儿学习弹奏“小白驴”这首曲目时，由于曲目的难度超过了小女儿当时的水平，因此需要经过非常艰苦的练习才能完成，但因为她的大女儿当时能够完成，因此虎妈坚信同年龄的小女儿一定也能做到。于是，她采取了几乎所有的办法，包括不吃饭，将撕坏的琴谱重新黏好，并采用多种多样的手段来进行练习，于是，到了最后，小女儿终于取得了突破，完成了这首曲子，母女重归于好，小女儿自信满满。
虎妈粗暴吗，相当粗暴，非常粗暴，但她并不简单。
就这个案例来分析一下她的粗暴而不简单的成功之处。
1. 她的没有针对小女儿本书进行指责和批评，而是针对所设定的目标给出具体的而明确的练习要求。没有因为小女儿不想练习就采取简单的体罚，譬如打手心、罚站等做法，而只是要求其坚持在钢琴旁边进行练习，不能分心去干别的事情或消极抵抗。
这一点与某些中国父母看到孩子成绩不理想就暴打一顿的做法显然有着天壤之别。
2. 在整个过程中，她保持了耐心、克制、冷静、理智，以及敢于承担责任的勇气。当小女儿失去信心，放弃努力，花样百出的不肯练习时，虎妈没有失去耐力和冷静，而是目标明确的加以坚持和引导。譬如当小女儿因为反复练习不能突破，因为要放弃努力而不被允许时，愤怒地将琴谱撕毁，但是虎妈没有因此被激怒，而是将琴谱重新黏好并装在塑料袋中以防再次被撕毁。这个小举动可以看住虎妈允许小女儿发泄自己的不满，但发泄完了之后还是要继续练习以达到事先设定的目标。当她的丈夫也提出反对意见的时候，她也努力加以说服，深刻地指出她并不想让女儿成为一个独特的失败者，并表示她愿意独自担当一个“被孩子憎恶的恶人”。
3. 有足够的知识、技能和办法。强制小女儿去反复练习也要讲方法，要有正确的办法。虎妈自身有一定的音乐素养，并且陪着女儿去听了每一节钢琴课，不仅有指导大女儿学钢琴的经验而且还操办了大女儿的几场音乐会，因此具备了指导小女儿进行练习的能力，在练习中不是简单的要求小女儿反复练习，而是采用多种练习手段变换使用，或者分解练习，或者综合演练，逐步推进，在小女儿难以坚持的时候，或者顾虑或者强制，最终使得小女儿取得突破，并且在随后的公开演奏中取得了成功。
对于这个问题还要多说几点，钢琴演奏技巧，本质上说也是一种动作技能的学习，而人类习得和掌握动作技能的过程既有基本的发育规律，也确实存在不同的天赋，因此若非十分把握，不要轻易拔苗助长，在体育运动训练中，就强调不要过早的进行专业化训练，要在运动员身体素质达到一定程度后再加量上强度，否则虽然能够较早的取得较好的运动成绩，但由于伤病等原因，潜力也就没了。
我猜想音乐演奏的技能，认知和学习，逻辑思维的发展，都有着自身的规律，在教育儿童的过程中应该遵循这样的规律，可以适度超前，但不宜超前太多。这就需要教育者对这些规律有一些基本的认识。
再举一个例子，当年马俊仁在训练女子中长跑运动员的时候，常常天不亮就要开始越野长跑训练，有的小运动员跑着累了就放慢速度，脱离了大队人马，于是马俊仁就躲在暗处学狼叫，小运动员听到后吓得赶紧加快速度跟上了大队。但如果这个小运动员这个时候确实已经体力不支了，恐怕这一声狼叫一阵猛加速就会导致训练过度，受伤，等等。
最后想说的是，虎妈教育女儿所取得的“成功”或许还需要时间的考验，但她的“成功”并不容易复制。